Rolling in the Deep

    I know I haven't really used this thing for a while, but right now I am going to use it right :). SO interesting week, I must say. Had an interesting encounter with marine dude. We talked for a few hours, finally established each other's age. I am still jail bate, he still reminds me of a manwhore. . . . So life is now going on. But, SERIOUSLY! This guy got in my head. He was an data analysis guy for the military and he also knows behavioral analysis and read me like a book. This of course pissed me off to no end, but that's the ego talking.
    SPEAKING OF EGO: Today I was supposed to do praise and worship for FCA, which turned out to be an entire disaster, and I even brought my guitar to school. Well, A girl in named Lori decided since apparently I'm not up to her standards in guitar playing apparently even though Ive been a worship leader for about a year now AND Ive been playing for at least that long. The most hilarious part is that she wasn't even able to get the strum pattern. But I cannot think about that. All that matters is that students were able to come together in the name of Christ in a public place and praise him- and I cannot let my jealousy or ego get in the way!
    Guess what! I got the understudy role for the MAIN character in footloose! I'm already a character, but I got the understudy for it! I was so excited. I feel bad though. My friend Becca can never seem to get a lead role and it really upsets her because she's a senior and she tries so hard. I don't know what to tell her! Her vocals aren't very good, but she has good acting. But musicals are mostly singing . . . I want to tell her that maybe next time or something but . . ..  UGH! I just- it makes me feel bad about having a good role. I feel like I can't express myself (and im not trying to sound stuck up or anything) without someone being all depressed because they wanted what I got. I have to be humble about it, and I do try. But am I not allowed to be happy that I tried hard for something and got it? It's not my fault that Im able to do certain things. There are plenty of stuff that I would like to be able to do . . . like MATH. But I can't. And I do get depressed about it. But I want to be able to express my happiness that I finally achieved something for myself. I'm allowed to be happy. I just don't know what to say to those who didn't get what they wanted. Get over it? That's too harsh. Maybe next time? Why lie when they're just going to get hurt again? This is why I just walk next to them silently a they vent and let them come to terms with things.
     Now speaking of math! Today, my amazing teacher- Ms. Cahill totally gained a butt more respect from me! Today I had my guitar with me and she asked if she could play it and, of course, I agreed. First she wanted me to play the class something and I was like "ummm, you gotta give me a song or something" so she decided to start playing "Rolling in the Deep" and said "sing!" so she started singing it and I joined and it was AMAZING! I'm talking revolutionary! I love her! It was amazing! Ya know, just in the middle of class, singing Adele like it's nothing, two part harmony and everything. So Amazing.